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“They’re crazy,” you’ll say, without ever taking responsibility for the roles you played in the past.
As my friend Jamie says, “Crazy recognizes crazy,” and she’s right.
I’d often come to her house to find him fixing the plumbing, installing lights and helping around the yard.
She only ever looked at Mike as her brother, she said, but it was no coincidence that she remained single right up until the time he and his wife moved away from the area.
It’s also a great defense against the glaring distractions of stand-ins for the real thing. Jolie-Pitt, and despite what you might think about how the whole Brangelina thing went down, her words speak to the importance of moving beyond our self-limiting perspectives of love. Get back in the saddle by remembering that our power to make new, loving choices only exists in the present.
You don’t have to have a perfect upbringing in order to experience love.
Yet, for perennial singles looking for love, recognizing the right time to venture into the dating pool remains a challenge. Where do you begin your search for lasting love when you’ve been out of practice?
Your answers will of course be unique to your situation, but I can tell you this much with confidence: if you find yourself reflected in any of the following scenarios, then it’s time to dust off your dating profile, dunk yourself into the nearest dating pool and head—heart first—for the deep end.
One of the biggest barriers to realizing love and intimacy with others is the inability to be our authentic selves.Let yourself receive love for its own sake and watch your relationships, your life and everything in it transform.I have a friend we’ll call, “Cynthia.” Cynthia has a sister whose husband, we’ll call him “Mike,” was on her speed dial anytime Cynthia needed help around her house.I was newish to town and told myself I wasn’t looking for anything serious since I’d probably be moving soon anyway. Loneliness happens to us all, but it needn’t distort the desires of your heart.Besides, treating yourself with kindness encourages others to do the same. Having come from a broken home, you kind of accept that certain things feel like a fairy tale, and you just don’t look for them.” The more disappointment and pain we experience, the more we resign ourselves to the impossibility of finding—or cultivating—a love that lasts.